The One Who Gave Her Mono

My roommate has not had the best luck with boys in the past. 

From boys with braces who drunkingly made out with her and recalling the event 

 the next day when her mouth was all cut up 
to blind dates with boys who wont say a word for the entire 12 hours 
they were forced to hang out.

Last year, we thought she had finally broken her horrible string of boys...

And then she got mono.

Let's take this back a few months-

They fell in like at first sight while cleaning the local pools, 

thus my roommate and her man soon became in item. 

He came around ALL the time and it seemed to be working out for them 

despite the fact that he lived two hours away. 

One day, we find out he has mono. 

Yes, the kissing disease!! 

SIDE NOTE: This is why you play beer pong with water so you don't all drink 
out of the same cups...have your own drink on the side :)

Continuing on; he gets mono and we all freak out. 

Fast forward a few weeks and my roommate is taken ill with what better than mono!

So she ends up going home for 2 months to get over the sickness,

missed so much school she has to drop classes and 

because of it all she is a semester behind. 

And what does her boyfriend who gave her the freakin' disease do?!?!?

Dumps her ass!

Apparently, having mono makes you "boring and a chore to be around."

Yes, those are the exact words he told my roommate 
as she was laying on her death bed that HE made for her. 

No surprise here, they have yet to talk (a year later) 

The moral of this story is- choose your boyfriends/girlfriends wisely! 

You cannot expect to date someone in college 
who has not hooked up in someway with another person. 
But, you should be cautious of the virus' people are carrying these days.

Think before you drink that cup you see sitting on the counter at a random party!

Don't make out with a boy/girl who has a suspicious looking cluster of bumps on their lip.

And lastly, try to find someone who you know will take care of you at your worst. 

There is nothing sweeter than having a boyfriend/girlfriend who loves you and 

takes care of you even when you look like shit.

The One Who Was In a Relationship

My brother is a simple guy.

No silly sayings on his shirts. 

Plain blue jeans everyday.
He would rather be watching an old black and white movie 

than going to a rager with his buddies.

Being the introvert that he is, there is not much time for interaction with the ladies. 

At 19 years old, he has yet to go out on a date...

Until NOW!

 Unfortunately, it did not turn out quite the way he had hoped
and this is how he explained it to me-

Brother: "So I met this girl in my video class and I asked her to dinner. 

We get to the restaurant, order our food and started talking about movies,
school and all the other date-like topics you would expect.
Then she hits me with the ultimate date mood killer."

Girl (In valley girl voice): "So I probably should have said something earlier and I don't know if you know, 

but I am in a relationship with someone."  

B: "I could not believe she was dating someone and went on what I though was a date with me! Then I was thinking, why would she tell me this now?
Why not wait until after I have paid for the damn meal!

So once the check came, I was like SPLITSIES!"

Now there is a lesson in this for both genders and it is unfortunate for my brother to have to go through this "date" to find it out.
But fortunate for me so I can blog about it!

A bitter-sweet story I would say.

 This goes for both males and females- don't lead anyone on!
If you're into them, take the risk and go for it.
If not, lay it down for them straight.

Don't go for that free meal that we all love.
You will sleep better at night, maybe not with a full stomach, but you will know 

that you did not hurt anyone along the way. 

The One Who Kidnapped Me

At my college, we have the ever so wonderful ratio of 

70% female and 30% male students. 

Being the straight female that I am, 
it leaves little wiggle room in the dating pool I have presented to me. 

Added to that minimal wiggle room is that fact that 

about half of the 30% are not attracted to my gender, 

a quarter are in a relationship and 

most of the other quarter already have a hook up buddy or are basically just undatable.

Luck was on my side last year when I found myself a man, I mean boy...

I admired him from afar in my Philosophy class and 

thanks to my charming personality, he was doing the same. 

We all know what the next step is in a relationship after you determine there is a spark.
 You make the friendship Facebook official!

This all basically leads up to our date. 

Our ONLY date. 

 Looking especially sharp in a blazer and jeans, 
he fetched me from my dorm and 

whisked me away to a lovely Italian dinner.

 We did the whole casual talk but I soon started to realize

that this was going nowhere and his awkwardness became all I could focus on. 

He paid for the meal, pulled out my chair and while walking 

to the car he offered his jacket. 

I know! 

Such a nice catch and yet I was ready to throw him back into the dating pond. 

As we drove off, he asked if I would like to go to his place to watch a movie. 

I pointed out that it was getting late and that I had some obligations in the morning. 

I figured that was a big enough hint towards 

'PLEASE take me home' 

but he took it a little differently than I had hoped. 

As we approached the school, I waited for him to turn into my dorm parking lot. 

Problem is, he passed it five parking lots ago!

 He was shortcuttin' it to his house.

I sat in the car silently trying to think of the best way 
to get out of this whole kidnapping thing.

Jump out of the car? No.
Too risky for my own well being.

Pretend I have an emergency phone call? No.
He will probably ask to come with me to make sure everything is alright.

Start to choke and be taken to the hospital? No.
He would stay over night to make sure I survived.

Unfortunately my brain could not process the information fast enough 

and I soon ended up in a random apartment complex

 where he insisted we watch a movie in his room. 

Alone.

On his bed.

With the lights off. 

If that is not considered kidnapping and holding hostage, I don't know what is.

He laid on his bed while I stuck to sitting in the corner farthest away from him 
while we watched a classic guy humor movie that showed way too many boobs 
then I was comfortable seeing with him on the first date. 

When the movie was over, 
he asked to watch another one, but once again,
I pulled out the whole "I have things to do tomorrow."

He finally got it this time and took me home. 

Besides the whole being held up in his room for three hours 
while feeling too uncomfortable to even use the bathroom, 
it was an interesting night to look back on.  

If/When this happens to you, make sure your roommates have your back!

My lack of support got me kidnapped and I will never let them forget that!

That way, if hours go by and there is no word from you, 

they can call you and that can be your get away!

That can lead to the difference between a hostage situation and 

being in the safe comfort of your own home!